Wednesday 5 September 2007

You are soooo busted

The garage I used in Lee Green are losers. This is the story of how I will have my revenge on them. They were due to collect the Gripemobile yesterday, between 9am and 1pm, to take it in for repairs. Mrs Gripe had an emergency appointment and needed to leave home at midday, so I called them at 8:30am:

Major: Hello, you are due to take my car in this morning. My wife has had a problem and needs to go for an appointment. She needs to leave at 12 - please can you ensure that you come in time for that.
Monkeywoman: No, we can't do anything like that.
Major: But I've just told you the circumstances, my wife needs to go to an emergency appointment. You are only 5 minutes away, I'm sure that they can do it.
Monkeywoman: No, we can't. Don't use your wife's situation on me. You'll have to rebook for 10 days time. I'm not going to help you.
Major: That's not acceptable. I'm not going to wait 10 days. All you need to do is send a driver up the road in the next 2 hours.
Monkeywoman: But our drivers are on a job now and they have to get to the next person before 11 because we promised her.
Major:
So you do do that then.
Monkeywoman:
Alright, we do, yes, but our drivers are all on the road.
Major: And they don't have mobile phones?
Monkeywoman: There is only one driver and he is deaf and dumb.
Major: You are telling me that you only have one deaf-mute driver...
Monkeywoman: Yes, what's wrong with that?
Major: Nothing's wrong with it, but your story sounds very improbably given how hard you've been trying not to help me.

Monkeywoman: Alright, I will try but it's probably not going to be possible.

To give the garage its credit, I had a very humble phone-call about an hour later, saying that they would do what they could. They did turn up in time for Mrs Gripe to get to her appointment. It also turns out that the driver was indeed deaf-mute, so it wasn't made up - which is what it sounded. Nonetheless, it is terrible service to have a refusal and then to be argued with when you try to reason with the person on the other end. And it doesn't inspire confidence about the repairs when all they want to do is argue with you.

Anyway, what they don't know is that I am employed by the insurance company they were working for as their in-house strategy consultant. Which means that I have a very good relationship with the MD and with the people who maintain the approved repairer network. So they will be getting a dressing down. It's nice to be able to do some mystery shopping once in a while.

[I have removed the garage's name from the post as I have taken it up with them and have resolved the issue with the owner and passed it on to my company.]

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